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UPDATED – Washington DC’s non-voting delegate to Congress, Eleanor Holmes Norton, had some difficulty getting her car parked on Wednesday.
Eleanor Holmes Norton, Washington D.C.’s congressional delegate, completed what witnesses said what the worst parking job they’ve ever seen on Wednesday.
Video from the incident, turned over to Roll Call’s “Heard on the Hill,” shows Norton, a Democrat, jamming her silver sedan into an angled parking spot between two other vehicles outside of the Longworth and Cannon House Office buildings.
“Eleanor Holmes Norton is struggling to park her car right now,” one witness says in the video.
“And she has hit that red car next to her, repeatedly,” another man adds. [TheDC]
Although Delegate Norton hasn’t apologized for or explained why she mangled* all five of Euclid’s geometric axioms along with two adjacent automobiles, she has announced that she will be taking parking lessons.
Here are 10 possible reasons for Delegate Norton’s lapse in… whatever it was that Big Time lapsed.
Top 10 Possible Reasons for Eleanor Holmes Norton’s Geometrically Challenged Parking:
10. Didn’t get the memo RE: Three Martini Lunches
9. Late for TV Interview: Laters Gonna Late
8. Distracted by sext message from someone calling himself Carlos Danger
7. Change We Can Believe In: Read the bumper sticker, moron
6. John Boehner did it first
5. Tried that b*tch Pelosi’s cosmetic surgeon: Eyes Wide Shut
4. Little known ObamaCare regulation: 77 is the new 107
3. Figuring out how to turn an energy efficient Hasbro toy into a Weapon of Mass Destruction
2. Capitol Police: Hands Up, Don’t Shoot
And the Number 1 reason for Eleanor Holmes Norton’s Geometrically Challenged Parking:
1. George Bush
File Under: Embrace the Stupid
*Fortunately no automobiles were damaged during this Democrat entitlement princess’s rampage, albeit no for lack of trying.
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