Alec Baldwin in Escape From New York (Check Your Local Listings)

Yep, Alec Baldwin has announced to the world that he is leaving New York and maybe even public life, forever.

This time.

Maybe.

Probably.

Or not, but let’s get on with the article anyway. Because Alec has written and published it now. It is a matter of public record. Like just about everything else Alec seems to think we need to know about his existence on earth.

Vulture via New York Daily News:

I probably have to move out of New York. I just can’t live in New York anymore. Everything I hated about L.A. I’m beginning to crave. L.A. is a place where you live behind a gate, you get in a car, your interaction with the public is minimal. I used to hate that. But New York has changed. Manhattan is like Beverly Hills. And the soul of New York has moved to Brooklyn, where everything new and exciting seems to be. I have to accept that. I want my newest child to have as normal and decent a life as I can provide. New York doesn’t seem the place for that anymore.

It’s good-bye to public life in the way that you try to communicate with an audience playfully like we’re friends, beyond the work you are actually paid for. …

Which is the Alec Baldwin we all know and love; the frolicking, playful Alec who you can just bump into on the street like any other Joe… and be threatened with assault and battery on your person.

And Brooklyn is not New York?

Anyway, so Los Angeles it is. Which is, let’s face it, about as far away from public life as an actor can get.

But wait.

Hold up a minute, Alec. Let’s not be hasty with the whole L.A. thing. Not that we wouldn’t just love to have you. Really. And gates are highly overrated. They don’t work. Just ask Lindsay Lohan. Just to mention someone with a gate.

And you want your new baby’s lungs to be healthy, right?

Smog. We have smog in L.A.

And TMZ. Harvey Levin is here. And he’s gay. Not to bring up a sore subject. About gays, not Harvey, who I hear thought you were hot in Malice.

And remember…

So please, Alec, don’t come to Los Angeles… For the sake of your family. Not that we wouldn’t really just love to have you… and everything.

Oh, by the way, Alec, did you hear that Harold Ramis died yesterday? He was a brilliant director and a very funny man. Harold didn’t make a big deal about it; he just went away. No woe-is-me New York Magazine op-ed or anything.

And he is someone New York, Chicago, Los Angeles and, well, just about everyone will miss.

HT: Every news outlet in the country that thought letting us know what Alec Baldwin is up to would be interesting.

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