Joe Biden 2016: Neked Launch

Female Secret Service agents turn their heads, Obama’s probably too busy looking at his own fine naked butt in the mirror to notice, and Jill isn’t talking.

But the Vice President of these United States is a nudist!

It’s hard to imagine—and o my god that was not a pun—that any American really needs or wants this information, but somebody went and wrote about it anyway.

Fox News:

It’s Biden in the buff.

A forthcoming book that claims to give a behind-the-scenes look at the people the Secret Service protects reportedly airs some tantalizing details about Vice President Biden’s swimming habits.

According to a New York Daily News account of the book, Secret Service agents say Biden likes to swim nude — to the chagrin of some in his detail.

“Agents say that, whether at the vice president’s residence or at his home in Delaware, Biden has a habit of swimming in his pool nude,” journalist and author Ronald Kessler reportedly writes in “The First Family Detail,” due to come out next week. “Female Secret Service agents find that offensive.”

It could be worse:

Kessler claimed that the Biden detail is considered the second-worst job in the Secret Service, next to the Hillary Clinton detail.

In which case one can envision a scenario in which female agents would have to use their guns.

Kessler used to work for The Washington Post, and later went to work for the conservative site Newsmax. He has written extensively about the Secret Service, and broke the story in 2012 about the prostitution scandal involving agents during a presidential visit to Colombia. [Fox News]

There may be a perfectly good reason Joe doesn’t like to wear his trunks, though.

His brain has to get air somehow.